Questioning and asking for help is a crucial part of growth. However when people spend their life asking for someone else to take care of them, rescue them, make their dreams come true, there is no growth taking place. The “responsibility” of answering this question often falls onto our partners. Is that fair or just forgetful? When we get so comfortable and reliant on our relationship to take care of our own needs the relationship dynamics change.
What often attracts our partner to us is our independent and free spirit. What lights us up makes us come alive. Our light shines and others are attracted to that. Our partners found that light to be most appealing and decided to check it out. Upon further investigation, they got to know, like and trust us. They enjoyed our company and being around that light.
There are times when we need to ask for help but it becomes another thing entirely when it becomes a pattern; waiting for someone else to take care of us or to make our dreams come true can place a burden on both our partners and ourselves. It is nice to help people and we all need help from time to time, yet waiting for someone to do for us something we can do for ourselves can be disempowering; It shifts how we view ourselves, our partners and our relationships.
When we blame other people or outside circumstances to explain why something hasn’t happened yet, we give our power away. Being responsible and accountable for our own actions and inactions places the power in our own hands, in our own being, where it rightfully is and should be. Whether we’re blaming others or even blaming ourselves, the questions aren’t answered and there’s no forward momentum. It keeps us stuck in the muck – the wheels are spinning but we’re really getting nowhere, fast.
What would happen if we showed up for ourselves? It’s not disheartening – it’s empowering! We don’t have to go it alone. We do need to show up for our own lives. We need to show up at work, show up in our relationships, show up and be accountable. If we need a new outfit, let others take care of you. If we need a dream vacation, call the travel agencies. However, if we need a change in our lives, we must start showing up for ourselves.
We are powerful beings. We CAN take care of ourselves. YOU are each stronger than you think. You can do what you need to do.
Believe in yourself. Believe in you. I do.
Let’s do this…..together is better!